10.06.03 Where to begin? Friday Night That was "our night". Our planned night together to cuddle on the sofa & watch movies. I had been saying all week that we needed a night just to ourselves to talk & laugh & be together alone without any distraction. Then I proceeded to fall asleep on the sofa at about 7:30pm, leaving BF to stay up alone all night with only a twelve-pack & Comedy Central to keep him company. Hahaha... ------- Saturday morning I worked on the CD cover for BF's band - front & back - for about 6 hours. When I was done, I copied the tracks from the computer to a handful of CDs and put them inside their new sleeves. Beautiful. They sold them all at the show later that night. Someone commented that the artwork on the cover was reason alone to purchase the CD. I have never been so proud of my artwork in all my life. And the show was so good! Before they played we all went down to Perelli's for drinks. (This is where BF got completely shit-faced.) There were only a handful of people there, mostly friends, yelling out strange requests and generally having fun. Lola asked me if they took requests and then yelled out "Shock the Monkey". BF, in a drunken moment, yelled out FUCK YOU ALL, and continued to jump around like a rock star. Hahaha. Did I mention how much fun it was? ------ Late Saturday Night Bo, being one of the last people left when the show was over, caught a ride with us back to our house. We sat around the living room listening to Optometry (DJ Spooky with MMW) and laughing about the night's events. There was a party of sorts going on at Kenny�s house and so I was coerced into driving. I was the only sober one. First I was subjected to being the entertainment for Kenny�s newest �girlfriend�, who talked my ear off about God awful sorority girl stuff until I felt as if I were going to die. Then she busts out a real kicker when I ask her what high school she went to. This is how the convo went: Me: I went to Scarydoll High, where�d you go? Her: I went to Sorority Girl Pretentious Private School. Me: Oh, cool. Her: Yeah, I would never go to Scarydoll High because there were too many �Niggers� that went there. Me: HAHAHAHAHA! Are you fucking serious? Me: *exits room laughing* What a dumbass bitch. I wonder if she realizes how completely STUPID that comment made her look. What a redneck thing to say. Hahaha. Fucking idiot. ------ Even Later Saturday Night So, after leaving Pretentious Sorority Girl alone in the den to find BF, I walk into Kenny�s bedroom where he is all laid out on the end of his bed staring at his closed bathroom door. I give him a questioning look. Where the hell is BF? BF walks in behind me and is also staring at the bathroom door. What the fuck? Who is in the bathroom & why does BF look like he�s ready to kick someone�s ass? The bathroom door swings open and out walks Bo. His shirtsleeve is rolled up past his elbow and there is a fucking needle hanging out of his arm. Oh. BF grabs Bo by the throat and slams him against the wall. �If this were MY house, you�d be dead�. Bo laughs as we haul him to the car. The ride to his house was silent (without conversation) except for Tool blasting on the speakers. When I get to his house, I don�t say a word. Instead, BF drags him out into his front yard and we leave him there to wallow around in the grass. When we got back home, I realized that he had left some stuff at my house � a cell phone, some clothes � which we promptly drove back to his house & threw in the front yard with him. Fuck a bowl-full of that. ------- Sunday Bo calls my cell phone repeatedly. I refuse to answer. His messages are apologetic & absolutely off center. �Don�t worry about me� � I wasn�t. �I am going to be okay� � Oh, really? �Call me when you don�t hate me anymore.� � Probably not. I am not worried about him anymore. I am not concerned for his well-being. I don�t fucking hate him. It�s just this � I am tired of lying there in the floor with him, helpless. I am tired of being strong for him while he does what ever he pleases. I am tired of struggling to get by while he takes 6 month re-hab vacations at 40 grand a pop. I am tired of feeling sorry for him because he claims he�s a �JUNKIE�. Fuck a bucket-full of that. Here we were trying to take him around semi-normal folks and there he is mainlining in their bathroom. Fuck it. ------- Today I feel the mood lifting. After spending most of the weekend asleep, I feel new this Monday morning. Between 4 pm on Friday and 6 am this Monday, I slept for a total of 34 hours. |
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