10.11.02 It's lunchtime, and I am soooo hungry. Somehow minute-rice & sugar (the only two food-like items in the house) don't seem appealing. I am SO in over my head. I just don't make enough money to live my life, though its fairly simple. rent. cell. power. food. cable. I wouldn't even list those in the order of thier importance (if any). If only I could give up eating. I passed by Bo's house today & I got my answer. No more were the funky lawnchairs and windchimes outside. I guess his mom cleaned it all away. I guess he is in jail for the long-haul. I saw Clay on campus the other day & we agreed to accompany each other to the next visit. We also agreed that there is way too much pressure when you are somebody's link to the real world. Like here I am, talking to Bo through the plexi-glass window (just like on tv) and I am telling him about my mundane life. "we got cable, now","man, you wouldn't believe", "baking apples", "working alot", "boyfriend is good, too".... and I feel so totally guilty for being boring. And I feel so bad for wanting to leave. And finally, visiting time is over, screams the guard. And back to his cell to sit and think about our (short for him, long for me) visit. Oh, how lame I am. I have meant to write him several times. But my world is busied, and frantic, and endless. I have so many "things to do"; and he has nothing but time. So for now, I fill up the ashtray on my lunch break and think about things. It's Friday. It's Friday. It's Friday. I will not drink tonight. I will clean my house. I will sleep a good sleep. Bye, bye. |
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