06.15.03 What if it were happening to me? What if I had been called on the telephone� a cheerful, summer Saturday in June� if I had answered the phone with a happy hello� if I had recognized the number on the caller ID... if I thought at first that it was a joke� if my very best friend had just killed herself... if she had laid out towels on top of her bed in a careful plan... "she was always a very thoughtful person"... if her husband had found a note on the nightstand when he returned from work... if she died there... her two dogs found huddling under the bed... What if I had talked to her JUST this morning & she had seemed fine� Would I think back to a day ago - a month ago � a year ago � would I search for some sign? A foreshadowing? Something to convince myself of guilt? Would my soul break into a million pieces onto the floor of the kitchen� on my knees and everything slows down... heart stopping. I try to close my eyes and try to imagine� horrible things� try to imagine for the sake of comfort. This just happened last night to my mother. It was her best friend - Mary Anne. |
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